I Remember...

I remember the first time we talked
and how you were totally different from your friend.

I remember being afraid to call you.
I had a question about our history homework. That was my excuse.
I was secretly hoping that you would not answer 'cause I was so nervous.

I remember you were my friend, my best friend.
I loved when we had classes together.
We had a baby in Biology class - our little bundle of joy on paper.
Everyone thought we were so cute together. We should hook up.
We both wanted that to happen, but we were too afraid to say it.
You told me in a letter on the last day of school.

I remember that summer. It was a summer of "firsts".
My first kiss, my first love, my first ...
I can't help but smile every time I think about you and me, we.

After all these years, I still remember.

I remember my first break up song.
"It could all be so simple
But you'd rather make it hard
Loving you is like a battle
And we both end up with scars
Tell me, who I have to be
To get some reciprocity
No one loves you more than me
And no one ever will."

I remember being in love,
and then it was over.
It was the end of innocence.

And Now...
Now, I know that it never ended.
I have had other male best friends and other boyfriends since then,
but none has compared to you.
My feelings for you laid dormant for so long that I thought they were forgotten.
Now, they are slowly rising back to the surface.

This is my letter to you, my first love.

I remember.


The sweetest thing I've ever known
Was like the kiss on the collarbone
Soft caress of happiness
The way you walk, your style of dress
I wish I didn't get so weak
Ooo, baby, just to hear you speak
Makes me argue just to see
How much you're in love with me
See, like a queen, a queen upon her throne

It was the sweet, sweet, sweetest thing I know,
It was the sweet, sweet, sweetest thing I know

I get mad when you walk away (don't walk away)
So I tell you leave, when I mean stay
Warm as the sun dipped in black
Fingertips on the small of my back
More valuable than all I own
Like your precious, precious, precious, precious dark skin tone

Sneaking on my mother's phone
The touching makes me think I'm grown, (you ain't grown)
Sweet prince of the ghetto
Your kisses taste like amoretto
Intoxicating, oh, so intoxicating
How sad, how sad that all things come to an end
But then again, I'm, I'm not alone

The Sweetest Thing
-Lauryn Hill